I know I am late to this one – really late, but this year, instead of seeing everyone’s “goals” or “resolutions”, people decided to pick a word that personified them for 2012.  I thought long and hard about that.  What would my word be in 2012? Sounds conceited right?  I don’t mean it to be.  2011 was a rough year for me and my family and I decided that 2012 is going be the year I improve myself.  There are {Read More}

It’s Saturday afternoon as I type this.  The girls are snuggled on the couch with iPads and blankets, Brian is gone geocaching, and I am writing and watching football.  I look around and think of all the millions of things I should be doing instead of sitting here on my computer.  I see the dust on the entertainment center.  The meals for next week need to be planned.  Laundry should be done. I think about the writing career I am {Read More}

  Everything I do is for those two girls. They are my number 1 priority.  When things get hard, I think of them and that gets me through.  All I want is their happiness and safety. I think I lost sight of that a bit the past few years.  But now my vision is clear again.  They are the most important thing in my life.   And then there is this guy – my wonderful husband.  He’s stuck by me {Read More}

This past year I almost lost my family. We have put it back together. And that is the best present ever.  

Lately I am striving to be better…. A better friend.  I tend to push people away as they get close and shut down from them.  I want to cultivate friendships again and be someone that others can always count on. A better daughter.  I want to show my mom and stepdad how much I appreciate all they have done for me.  I want to take the time to pick up the phone and call my dad or send him an {Read More}

Today I feel love… The love of a mother for a daughter that has messed up again and needs her help even in her 30s. The love of children who think that their mother is perfect. The love of a husband for his wife who has come to him yet again for his patience and understanding. The love of a God so great that forgives over and over again.

I love these two monkeys more than anything. They are my world. Almost everything I do is for them. There are times, ok, a lot of times, that I don’t feel like the best mom in the world. At work, we like to joke call our mommy mess ups our “mother of the year” moments. Sometimes I forget things or yell when I shouldn’t. I wonder if putting my youngest in kindergarten this year will scar her for life. I {Read More}

Life is full of choices. I know that this is no huge revelation to anyone. The last year of my life has been full of hard choices – harder choices than I have ever had to make ever. Choices that I know are right, but still hurt me so bad at times I feel like I am breaking into a million pieces. Many of the choices I have made in the last year have hurt the ones I love the {Read More}

I suffer from depression. Maybe I have my whole life, I don’t know. I didn’t really recognize it though until after I had my second baby. My girls are only 17 months apart and it was very overwhelming to work full time and try to take care of my girls, my husband, my home, my job, and myself. On the surface it looked like everything was ok. To the outside world, I probably looked like I had things together and {Read More}